One of the benefits of our gym is that our PLL state mental health advocate Karen also goes there in the morning. So we had a nice talk on the floor...all of us sweating...after our workouts... with her. She gave us some options. A bed had already been open for Kylie at RTC so that was good and we resolved we would haul her "happy butt" back to Blackfoot. Trav took another day off to deal with it.
Well I think the rest of this story is obvious. Kylie refused to go...so we had to make some threats...police were called...they told us they couldn't do anything...
blah blah blah...
Trav finally got upset with them and told them she tried to commit suicide last weekend and we need her somewhere safe. I guess I don't blame the police. They don't know how good she is at making us look crazy and how innocent she is. Sure...she snuck her boyfriend in but that doesn't warrant RTC and she tried to talk to us about it and wanted and deserved a different consequence that wasn't so hard. And the police only see it as an isolated incident. I'm sure they are all together talking about what crazy parents we are. I mean...we've met NINE of them now. How many can there be in Ammon???!!! Well we got the probation officer on the phone who I also sometimes suspect thinks we are crazy. We got Karen on the phone and she offered to talk to the police to tell them that Kylie is out of control and needs the authoritative order for her to go. The officer spoke with his supervisor who finally told him after an hour of them being here that he could take her to the Gus House in Idaho Falls. It's a group home type setting but we found the woman there to be quite helpful.
I can't express the way my heart broke as I watched her being cuffed and walked out to the police car barefoot, baggy sweats that are too big and frankly a little ghetto, a sweatshirt, messy matted hair, and her face looking so broken and mentally ill. I know it sounds like it couldn't be but I can SEE the mental illness in her eyes and face. Kamryn turned to me and said after she left, "I hope nobody we know saw that because that would be really embarrassing." Haha...guess what Kamryn...those 2 police cars were parked outside for over an hour. A policeman was standing at the front door...another in the bathroom with Kylie...and the one who was "in charge" of it all. They were the most unwilling to help this time as I have ever seen. I knew if they didn't do something we had lost power with Kylie and the police did too...luckily they got permission to escort her to Gus house. I'm betting the neighbors right about now are thrilled we moved into the neighborhood. I just can't decide if she's manic right now or on the downside. Usually when she's manic she at least combs her hair and puts on a little mascara. But her ravenous eating, lack of sleep and hypersexual feelings tell me otherwise. I wonder if we will get a med change. But then it doesn't matter if she doesn't take them.
We were privileged to sit through another "admitting process" with all the questions. And then my heart broke again as she explained how she has no friends and no support system. I guess we as her parents don't count as a support system. The funny thing is that she didn't even mention David as being a support for her. I can read in to that a million ways. And then the worst part of it all...I watched Travis completely break down. I mean sob like a baby like I've never ever seen before. I've really only seen him cry maybe 4 times in our 18+ years of marriage and never seen him sob like that. Which in turn made me cry. And Kylie. What a mess we all are. The good part is that Travis gets his emotional day...I had mine Sunday... and I'm feeling good enough at this point to take over the shift for a while so he can take an emotional vacation for a while. Our Bishop actually told me we would need to do that from time to time!
New Haven RTC hasn't called or emailed me back. Not a good sign. So I guess I start paperwork to see if Butte will take her.
Bi-polar is kicking my butt. And I'm not even the one who has it.
On a different note...I am reading this book by Jessie Close (Glenn Close's sister) that Deb recommended to me and it is so good. It has given me so much insight into her illness. So many things that Jessie went through and her thought process is so similar to Kylie that I just can't deny for a minute that she is bi-polar.
I hope and pray no other member of my family has to go through this hell with any of their kids. It is so hard to watch your child self-destruct before your very eyes. It's sometimes too much for this heart to take.
"Pure Christlike LOVE flowing from true righteousness can change the world." Jeffrey R Holland
Happy Valentine's Day!
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